Brinley was here and now is gone.

On Tuesday August 17, 2010 at 4:30pm is when we didn't hear the beloved heartbeat of our little girl that had yet to be born. That is a moment I will remember for the rest of my life. It was from there that I had the sad realization that the little girl I was looking forward to hold wouldn't be spending her life with us. She had moved on from this life.

She was born on August 18, 2010 at 5:41pm. She was 19 inches long and weighed 6 lbs 2 oz. The brief time we had with her was good, I just wish we had longer. Her name is Brinley Nicole Moore and she will always be my lil girl.

When she was born her umbilical cord was around her neck. We may never know why we were chosen to go through such a horrible event but we are strong and will make it through. This whole situation just really sucks and I keep thinking I will wake up from this nightmare but every day it is more real.

I feel like I have been robbed. I should have a baby in my arms but I am home empty handed! It just makes me so mad!

Mini-Update

**Sorry I posted this from my cell phone and for some reason it split the blog into 5 blogs instead of just 1. Got it fixed now though.

Went to the doctor today to be checked and determine if I was leaking amniotic fluid. Good news is I am not leaking any fluid. Brinley's heartbeat was at 155 bpm. She has been moving around plenty today so everything is going good.


The doctor did say that my mucus plug has already come out and that I am dialated 2 to 2 1/2 centimeters. I haven't noticed any Braxton hicks contractions except for once the other day but I guess I've been having them. I still have 1 week to go before she is considered full-term.

I have 2 classes to attend this weekend. 1 is for infant care and the other is a breastfeeding class. Also I have finished my college classes for the summer and ended up getting an A in art history and a B in Spanish. Yay me!

Week 34 - 3rd Trimester aches and pains

I'm well into my 3rd trimester now. At 34 weeks along I only have a month and 1/2 to my due date. I have noticed that the fatigue has set back in. With having to get up to go to the bathroom every couple of hours at night, tossing and turning to get comfortable, and not to mention I have a belly the size of a bowling ball on the front of me that makes me 10 degrees hotter, it's no wonder I am so tired. I have also been having a pain in my wrists and cramps in my legs and my back hurts from time to time. It is hard to get up and walk anywhere because I get short of breath. I have found that I can't eat a whole lot in one sitting either. This is because Brinley is pushing up on my lungs and stomach so I have no room to breathe or eat.

This week Brinley weighs about 4 3/4 pounds which is as much as a cantalope. http://www.babycenter.com/slideshow-baby-size

Overall I have been doing pretty good. These are all things that can be expected in this part of the pregnancy and it could be worse so I am thankful that I have stayed healthy throughout this whole process. I am in my last week of classes so I can see the light at the end of the tunnel now. Yay!! I have 2 exams next week then I am DONE with school for a few months so I can focus on Brinley and adjusting to my new life. I am looking forward to our little vacation the end of next week to Santee. It will be nice to have a weekend of nothing to do. Then it is back to getting ready for the whole labor and delivery thing that comes with having a baby.

Here is a 3D image of our little girl.

We got the ultrasound done at http://www.specialdeliveryimaging.com/ in Myrtle Beach, SC.

31 Weeks and boy am I emotional...

Today I feel like crap. I want to cry. I think I am more emotional than I have been this whole pregnancy. It has all caught up with me. I should be happy that I will be done with one of my three classes after today but I just want to curl up in the bed and not get up for a week.

I have been having bad dreams about my exams and helicoptors crashing and job interviews going wrong. Where are my happy dreams about the baby?!?

I try not to think about the stress but I can't help it. I hate crying and wish I didn't shed a tear everytime I got mad or upset but I can't help it. I just cry.

Anyway here are some new pregnancy photos of me. They were taken yesterday.

I've got a final exam to go study for.

Week 30 - She keeps kicking me.

This is my 30th week of being pregnant which means I have about 10 weeks left if I go full-term. That is only 2 1/2 months left before our little girl will be here. This week she weighs as much as a head of cabbage, 3 pounds, and I feel every bit of her moving now. She has been getting hiccups on a daily basis even a few times a day. It's hard to believe she is going to gain another 3 to 5 pounds before she is born. As she gets bigger the space for her to move will decrease so her movements shouldn't hurt as much I hope. lol Brinley is able to open her eyes and her eyesight is improving. When she is born her eyesight will be about 20/400 so she will only be able to see objects right in front of her face.

http://www.babycenter.com/6_your-pregnancy-30-weeks_1119.bc?responsys_count=1&scid=mbtw_preg30:803&pe=2UxbhP7


Right now I am in the middle of my semester for my summer classes so I have to study for mid-term exams but all I want to do is read baby books, watch shows about pregnancy and go shopping for baby stuff. It's hard to focus on school work when I have a baby moving around inside of me all day reminding of what is to come. July looks to be a busy month for me as well. I have several different classes scheduled on childbirth, infant CPR, and newborn care. I also have my baby showers scheduled and trying to finish all my school work. I'll be ready for a break before the baby gets here. August I plan to spend a lot of time in the pool since I will be done with classes. Yay!

Week 28 - 3rd Trimester

Today was a great day. I'm feeling pretty good about this whole pregnancy thing and really starting to enjoy being pregnant. I think I have finally come around which is good considering that I only have 3 more months to go now.

I still have a couple of busy months ahead of me with childbirth classes, newborn care classes, doctor appointments (I have one tomorrow then have to start going every two weeks), work and school. Luckliy I have about 3 more weeks in one class then I can concentrate on the other two I have until the begining of August.

I'm finding it harder to bend over to shave in the shower or pick things up off the floor. I have also noticed that I am a little clumsy and my balance is off as well.

My weight was 196.9 this morning which is about what it was last week so I haven't gained any weight in the last week. I am trying to watch what I eat but it is hard because I really like sweets. lol Brinley weighs about the same as a Chinese cabbage which is 2 1/4 pounds. She still has a long way to grow.

http://www.babycenter.com/slideshow-baby-size

Nearing the 26th week

Only 100 more days to go. Seems like it will take forever and I am glad. I need all that time to prepare for the big change that is about to happen in my life. Being pregnant is an adventure. I have had up and down days. Mostly up though which is good. Today I feel a little dizzy and I keep burping the taste of that darn iron pill I have to start taking every day. 

Had my last doctor appointment on Wednesday of this week. It went well, had to do the Glucose Screening Test to check and see if I have diabetes and I don't thank God. My glucose needed to be below 135 and it was 130 so I passed that test. My iron came back at 10.5 and they want it to be at least 11.5 so I have to start taking an iron pill everyday. I can't take it at the same time as my prenatal which I have been taking at night so it doesn't make me sick. So I am taking the iron pill in the morning and now have to deal with this nasty taste... Yuck!

They also said I have gained 9 pounds since I started going there about 2-3 months ago. She said that was fine as long as I have been eating healthy and I have for the most part. I guess I better start watching what I am eating more cause I don't want to be a fat cow. lol 

Brinley has been moving a lot everyday. Sometimes it feels like she is rolling around in there and other times it is like she is trying to punch her way through my side. I can only imagine how much more I will be able to feel her move as she grows. I actually saw my tummy move for the first time at the doctor's office the other day. I've been watching my tummy when I feel her moving in hopes of seeing it so that was interesting to see.

I went and had another ultrasound done at HGTC yesterday but haven't scanned in the pictures yet. Brinley likes to not be cooperative when I am getting my ultrasounds. She always seems to have her hand or foot in the way of the shot. They tried to get me a good profile shot but she just wouldn't let them. I hope she isn't this much trouble after she is born. 

Here I am at 23 Weeks along.

And here is a shot I took with my phone at the ultrasound. They have plastic babies at different sizes. The one I am holding is for a 5 month old so she should be a little bigger than that now.

Happy Friday!!