Brinley was here and now is gone.

On Tuesday August 17, 2010 at 4:30pm is when we didn't hear the beloved heartbeat of our little girl that had yet to be born. That is a moment I will remember for the rest of my life. It was from there that I had the sad realization that the little girl I was looking forward to hold wouldn't be spending her life with us. She had moved on from this life.

She was born on August 18, 2010 at 5:41pm. She was 19 inches long and weighed 6 lbs 2 oz. The brief time we had with her was good, I just wish we had longer. Her name is Brinley Nicole Moore and she will always be my lil girl.

When she was born her umbilical cord was around her neck. We may never know why we were chosen to go through such a horrible event but we are strong and will make it through. This whole situation just really sucks and I keep thinking I will wake up from this nightmare but every day it is more real.

I feel like I have been robbed. I should have a baby in my arms but I am home empty handed! It just makes me so mad!

Mini-Update

**Sorry I posted this from my cell phone and for some reason it split the blog into 5 blogs instead of just 1. Got it fixed now though.

Went to the doctor today to be checked and determine if I was leaking amniotic fluid. Good news is I am not leaking any fluid. Brinley's heartbeat was at 155 bpm. She has been moving around plenty today so everything is going good.


The doctor did say that my mucus plug has already come out and that I am dialated 2 to 2 1/2 centimeters. I haven't noticed any Braxton hicks contractions except for once the other day but I guess I've been having them. I still have 1 week to go before she is considered full-term.

I have 2 classes to attend this weekend. 1 is for infant care and the other is a breastfeeding class. Also I have finished my college classes for the summer and ended up getting an A in art history and a B in Spanish. Yay me!

Week 34 - 3rd Trimester aches and pains

I'm well into my 3rd trimester now. At 34 weeks along I only have a month and 1/2 to my due date. I have noticed that the fatigue has set back in. With having to get up to go to the bathroom every couple of hours at night, tossing and turning to get comfortable, and not to mention I have a belly the size of a bowling ball on the front of me that makes me 10 degrees hotter, it's no wonder I am so tired. I have also been having a pain in my wrists and cramps in my legs and my back hurts from time to time. It is hard to get up and walk anywhere because I get short of breath. I have found that I can't eat a whole lot in one sitting either. This is because Brinley is pushing up on my lungs and stomach so I have no room to breathe or eat.

This week Brinley weighs about 4 3/4 pounds which is as much as a cantalope. http://www.babycenter.com/slideshow-baby-size

Overall I have been doing pretty good. These are all things that can be expected in this part of the pregnancy and it could be worse so I am thankful that I have stayed healthy throughout this whole process. I am in my last week of classes so I can see the light at the end of the tunnel now. Yay!! I have 2 exams next week then I am DONE with school for a few months so I can focus on Brinley and adjusting to my new life. I am looking forward to our little vacation the end of next week to Santee. It will be nice to have a weekend of nothing to do. Then it is back to getting ready for the whole labor and delivery thing that comes with having a baby.

Here is a 3D image of our little girl.

We got the ultrasound done at http://www.specialdeliveryimaging.com/ in Myrtle Beach, SC.

31 Weeks and boy am I emotional...

Today I feel like crap. I want to cry. I think I am more emotional than I have been this whole pregnancy. It has all caught up with me. I should be happy that I will be done with one of my three classes after today but I just want to curl up in the bed and not get up for a week.

I have been having bad dreams about my exams and helicoptors crashing and job interviews going wrong. Where are my happy dreams about the baby?!?

I try not to think about the stress but I can't help it. I hate crying and wish I didn't shed a tear everytime I got mad or upset but I can't help it. I just cry.

Anyway here are some new pregnancy photos of me. They were taken yesterday.

I've got a final exam to go study for.

Week 30 - She keeps kicking me.

This is my 30th week of being pregnant which means I have about 10 weeks left if I go full-term. That is only 2 1/2 months left before our little girl will be here. This week she weighs as much as a head of cabbage, 3 pounds, and I feel every bit of her moving now. She has been getting hiccups on a daily basis even a few times a day. It's hard to believe she is going to gain another 3 to 5 pounds before she is born. As she gets bigger the space for her to move will decrease so her movements shouldn't hurt as much I hope. lol Brinley is able to open her eyes and her eyesight is improving. When she is born her eyesight will be about 20/400 so she will only be able to see objects right in front of her face.

http://www.babycenter.com/6_your-pregnancy-30-weeks_1119.bc?responsys_count=1&scid=mbtw_preg30:803&pe=2UxbhP7


Right now I am in the middle of my semester for my summer classes so I have to study for mid-term exams but all I want to do is read baby books, watch shows about pregnancy and go shopping for baby stuff. It's hard to focus on school work when I have a baby moving around inside of me all day reminding of what is to come. July looks to be a busy month for me as well. I have several different classes scheduled on childbirth, infant CPR, and newborn care. I also have my baby showers scheduled and trying to finish all my school work. I'll be ready for a break before the baby gets here. August I plan to spend a lot of time in the pool since I will be done with classes. Yay!

Week 28 - 3rd Trimester

Today was a great day. I'm feeling pretty good about this whole pregnancy thing and really starting to enjoy being pregnant. I think I have finally come around which is good considering that I only have 3 more months to go now.

I still have a couple of busy months ahead of me with childbirth classes, newborn care classes, doctor appointments (I have one tomorrow then have to start going every two weeks), work and school. Luckliy I have about 3 more weeks in one class then I can concentrate on the other two I have until the begining of August.

I'm finding it harder to bend over to shave in the shower or pick things up off the floor. I have also noticed that I am a little clumsy and my balance is off as well.

My weight was 196.9 this morning which is about what it was last week so I haven't gained any weight in the last week. I am trying to watch what I eat but it is hard because I really like sweets. lol Brinley weighs about the same as a Chinese cabbage which is 2 1/4 pounds. She still has a long way to grow.

http://www.babycenter.com/slideshow-baby-size

Nearing the 26th week

Only 100 more days to go. Seems like it will take forever and I am glad. I need all that time to prepare for the big change that is about to happen in my life. Being pregnant is an adventure. I have had up and down days. Mostly up though which is good. Today I feel a little dizzy and I keep burping the taste of that darn iron pill I have to start taking every day. 

Had my last doctor appointment on Wednesday of this week. It went well, had to do the Glucose Screening Test to check and see if I have diabetes and I don't thank God. My glucose needed to be below 135 and it was 130 so I passed that test. My iron came back at 10.5 and they want it to be at least 11.5 so I have to start taking an iron pill everyday. I can't take it at the same time as my prenatal which I have been taking at night so it doesn't make me sick. So I am taking the iron pill in the morning and now have to deal with this nasty taste... Yuck!

They also said I have gained 9 pounds since I started going there about 2-3 months ago. She said that was fine as long as I have been eating healthy and I have for the most part. I guess I better start watching what I am eating more cause I don't want to be a fat cow. lol 

Brinley has been moving a lot everyday. Sometimes it feels like she is rolling around in there and other times it is like she is trying to punch her way through my side. I can only imagine how much more I will be able to feel her move as she grows. I actually saw my tummy move for the first time at the doctor's office the other day. I've been watching my tummy when I feel her moving in hopes of seeing it so that was interesting to see.

I went and had another ultrasound done at HGTC yesterday but haven't scanned in the pictures yet. Brinley likes to not be cooperative when I am getting my ultrasounds. She always seems to have her hand or foot in the way of the shot. They tried to get me a good profile shot but she just wouldn't let them. I hope she isn't this much trouble after she is born. 

Here I am at 23 Weeks along.

And here is a shot I took with my phone at the ultrasound. They have plastic babies at different sizes. The one I am holding is for a 5 month old so she should be a little bigger than that now.

Happy Friday!!

Baby Registries

Okay I finally finished my baby registries. Here are the links to them both:

Target
http://www.target.com/registry/baby/2IRSDJS7CDSWP

Babies R Us / Toys R Us
http://www.toysrus.com/registry/search/index.jsp?_flowExecutionKey=_c5A115260-F69E-EC6A-F945-2813C807E166_kD3B44C9E-C367-20E8-B033-2D53A59E08F3&overrideStore=TRUS


You might notice I don't have ANYTHING so hopefully I covered EVERYTHING I might need in these two registries. Some items can be ordered online others are only available in the store. I will be updating them as I find stuff I might have missed so be sure to check them once in awhile.

I only have about 4 more months to go before Brinley is here.

It's a GIRL!! Brinley Nicole Moore

Well we got the confirmation we were waiting for yesterday. It is a girl. Sorry Papa Wayne, we will try again for the boy. Here are the shots from the second ultrasound from www.specialdeliveryimaging.com

I've also included some updated shots of my belly bump at 21 weeks. Looks to me like I'm starting to get bigger. Certainly feels like it... couldn't get my jeans buttoned today. lol Time to stick those pants in the closet for now. I'm glad I got those prego pants from my friend Shannon cause apparently it was time to.

It's a GIRL!!!

Profile shot

Another shot of her face

My belly at 21 weeks

Week 21 Movements and Gender

So I am now 21 weeks along and finally had my ultrasound done last Tuesday. The doctor said everything seemed to be progressing along very nicely so I probably won't be having another done at the doctors office. Our little baby girl or boy wasn't cooperating when it came time to determine the gender so the best GUESS the technician could give us was that it was a girl. (Her legs were crossed so it was hard to tell.) The following day I had my doctor appointment and met with the midwife of the office and she said it had a girl's heartbeat (154 bpm) also so she was going with girl. Apparently a girl's heartbeat is typically between 150 and 160 bpm and a boy's is between 130 and 140 bpm. So Jenna and I went to Carter's and bought a bunch of girl's clothes that afternoon. Girl's clothes are so much cuter than boy clothes. Here is the only picture I got from the ultrasound.

I'm going today to have another 2D ultrasound done to determine the gender at an outside place that specifically does ultrasounds for memories. I will be going back in a few more weeks to get a 3D ultrasound done then I will be able to get a portrait of the baby after he/she is born. They have different packages depending on how much you want to spend and exactly what you are wanting from the ultrasound. Here is the website:

http://www.specialdeliveryimaging.com/

I've been feeling the baby move for a few weeks now. It started out as little taps and kicks but now I can really feel them. Mark was able to feel the baby kick last week but it is still very subtle. I've determined that it feels as weird as I thought it would. Does anyone else find it weird to have another living being moving around inside of you? Well I do... It just creeps me out but at the same time I like it cause I know that the baby is alive and well.

I can tell a pattern for when I feel the movements too. It is usually around 11am, 5pm, and 10pm. I have to be sitting still in order to feel it but that is when I notice it most. This week the baby is supposed to be 10 1/2 inches long from head to foot about the length of a carrot which is pretty long in my book. My sister's son was 21 inches long when born so that means that my baby will be about twice as long as it is now when born. Man that just freaks me out too. lol

Well that is what's going on in my baby world this week.

Halfway Point (Week 20)

As I hit week 20 I thought I should start working on my baby registries. Here is a link to the first one I started. I will be adding more stuff over the next few weeks and plan on going to Target to start a second registry.

Babies"R"Us - Baby Registry

Starting this week the baby will start being measured from head to foot instead of head to butt. So last week the baby was about 6 inches long (head to butt), this week he/she is 6 1/2 inches from head to butt and 10 inches from head to foot. About the length of a banana and they weigh 10 1/2 ounces. It is still hard to believe I have something growing inside of me. It is scary to think I will be responsible for a little person in just few more short months. I don't have any doubts that I can handle it but it is a big life changing event that is going to happen. Well it is late and I'm tired just wanted to give a quick update...

Week 18 - 1st week of month 5

Wow can't believe I have already made it to my 5th month. I remember hoping I would make it through the 1st trimester without any major complications. Well I added a couple of widgets to my blog thanks to another blog I stumbled across when researching sciatic nerve pain.

One tracks the size of the baby each week which I have already been researching on BabyCenter every week. This week according to Baby Center the baby is the length of a bell pepper and according to the widget it is the size of a sweet potato. It's neat to get the different foods for comparison. I can relate better to the sweet potato. lol

I'm pretty sure I have felt the baby moving mostly in the evenings when I am sitting and watching TV. I can't wait to find out what I am having. My ultrasound is scheduled for April 27th at 10:30 am and my doctor appointment is scheduled for the following day at 9:15am. I am adding a poll to the side for everyone to answer whether they think I am having a boy or girl. So get your votes in before April 27th and hopefully we will all find out what our lil sweet potato will be.

Week 16

Right now he or she is the size of an avocado. As I sit here watching a lecture video for class I think I feel you move. A flutter here, a bump there. It isn't strong but it is unlike anything I've felt before. It is low in my belly and very light. I still can't be sure though. It is scary to think there is a living being inside of me.

I am in my forth month now and don't feel like I am showing my pregnancy, this is due to the belly fat that I had before getting pregnant. To me, I don't look any bigger even though my jeans are tighter. I used to think pregnant women started showing about 3 months but now I know that isn't true for everyone.

Birthing thoughts

So I just stumbled across a Chinese Gender calendar that is said to be 90% accurate at guessing the gender of the baby. So I put in my age of 26 and the month of conception which was December. It says I am having a GIRL. 

http://www.thebump.com/calculators/ChineseGenderChart.aspx

Also I am having to change doctors since my original doctor won't file medicaid as a second insurance. So I am changing to a doctor in Conway that has a Midwife there. I think I might try to have this baby without the drugs. After watching this movie documentary called The Business of Being Born. It talked about how Midwives are used throughout the world and not so much here. That the infant mortality rate is 2nd highest in the US when compared to the rest of the world and that the rate of C-Sections in the USA is 47%. That just scared me. I don't want to have a C-Section if at all possible and don't want to be pressured into getting one before the baby is ready to come out. 

I think by going with a Midwife I could avoid this. I think I would also like to have a waterbirth but i don't think Medicaid covers that....I just can't afford it otherwise. Maybe the hospital has a bathtub in the birthing room. I haven't been the Conway hospital birthing rooms yet to see. They do tours on Sunday at 2pm so I will have to go by and see what they have.

Beginning 2nd trimester

I am 14 weeks now and well I have found that I don't really like eating meat. I guess I need to find some other way to get the nutrients I usually get from meat. Mostly my iron cause that is already on the low end. Actually I am hungry right now but I don't feel like making anything. I never really liked meat anyway but now it is just gross. lol

I feel relieved that my chance of miscarriage is now less than 1%. I don't know why I worry about things like that but I do. Good news is Jaime is supposed to be having her baby in the next few days. If she doesn't go into labor before Thursday she is going to be induced in the morning. I hope everything goes well with the delivery.

Here are the ultrasounds from week 6. He is just a little pea.

I had an ultrasound done last week at the college and the baby actually looks like a baby now. Here are the pictures I got. Still too early to tell whether it is a boy or girl but there is defiantly a baby in there.

Belly shots

Here are some pictures of my stomach through my pregnancy so far. Me at week 6, week 11, and week 12. I haven't really gained any weight since getting pregnant but that might have something to do with the workout program I started about the same time as my week 6 photo.

Right now my weight is 185. According to the pregnancy book I've been reading I should start gaining about a pound a week after this week.

Taken from babycenter.com:

Also IF I am having a girl, she now has more than 2 million eggs in her ovaries. My baby is almost 3 inches long (the size of a medium shrimp) and weighs nearly an ounce.

Baby clothes

Just bought my first baby clothes. Since I don' t know what I am having yet I bought some yellow and green colored clothes. I think they are just adorable. I also got a Eddie Bauer baby bouncer and bathtub.

Quick thoughts

I've been using babycenter.com to post information about my pregnancy but my husband suggested I start a pregnancy blog so that is what I am doing. I found the other website to be somewhat cumbersome when trying to post or look at comments left.

Today I am starting my 13th week which is the last week in the first trimester. After this week my risk of miscarriage drops to less than 1%. I am also supposed to start gaining 1 pound a week....can't wait for that to happen. :)